The Real Housewives Of teletubbyLand
Camera fades in and opens to a scene with the Voice Trumpets.
"Come one, come all, to the Teletubby Ball.
An overhead shot of the venue
Where colors swirl across the dance hall
Roll complications of the cast walking into the Tubbytronic Superdome
And two will have an all-out brawl
Dipsy throws a glass of wine
Will the four finally see their fall
Dramatic footage of Lala being pushed to the ground
Will this be the end of it all?"
"YOU BITCH" echoes loudly in Po's distorted voice
Camera dissolves into a pan across a grassy knoll
Tinky-Winky skips across the screen with that cute little purse they used to carry everywhere.
They pull out a compact and powder their cheeks, blush blindness affects everyone, even Teletubbies.
Tinky-Winky walks into a home we come to know as the residence of Noo-Noo, the anthropomorphic vacuum cleaner.
It cuts to Noo-Noo's kitchen. She's in there with a freshly made iced coffee and a Skims set from the campaign she was just featured in.
he starts telling Tinky-Winky about the night out she had with Po just a few weeks ago where things got a little crazy.
"We were out at Hamburger Mary's for a local show, when all of a sudden one of the queens started hitting on Po's husband.
She was fucking pissed! It's like have you never been to a drag show in your life before?
The craziest part? She was mad AT ME? She thought I had paid the queen off because she had seen me tip her earlier that night.
Tink, you know I would never do that to her, we've been best friends since kids. She was the first person I called when my ex asked for a divorce. It's like... why is she doing this to me!?"
Cut to black and grey-toned footage from the bar. Po's hands are wrapped in a ratty blonde wig. The drag queen has a striking resemblance to Tinky-Winky.
The voice of Po screams in the distance:
"YOU BITCH, GET YOUR SNOUT OFF MY HUSBAND'S NOO-NOO"
Cut back to Noo-Noo's living room, she's nearing tears
Tinky-Winky opens his purse and pulls out a Kleenex and knocks out a box of false lashes.
“Noo-Noo, I have a confession." He says, wiping tears from his eyes.
"But you have to swear to me you won't tell a soul."
Noo-Noo looks at the false lash on the floor and back to him, dabbing at her eyes. "Of course, hun."
"I've been sleeping with Po's husband. That was me in drag at Hamburger Mary's that night."
Cut to the sun high in the sky. He’s older now, looks to be in his mid-20s. Kind of sexy, actually. You wonder if they will finally show more than his face.
"YOU BITCH!" echoes faintly in the horizon as the screen fades to black
End Season 1, Episode 1
I PostEd This week
An Unserious tiktok
Colourfully,
Clebbie Debbie
